I’m on the train, alone. Well, not alone exactly, there is a driver and a manager and other passengers, of course, but you get the gist.
I’m without The Bearded Manc and kids.
This kind of event only happens about twice a year.
At this point I think I am supposed to say that I am experiencing ‘parent guilt’, but I’m not. I’m at home with my kids, every day and every night, why should I feel guilty? Whoever started the myth that parents are not allowed ‘alone time’ was a right twit with a big mouth.
I do miss them though and it’s only been just over an hour since I left home. I’ve already looked at way too many photos and sent The Bearded Manc a ridiculous number of texts, which is no doubt driving him nuts. Sorry babe.
I’m on my way to see one of my best friend’s who recently had some really wonderful news, and some pretty sh*t news too. It’s time we had a hug in real life, big boobs in the way and all. We both need it but she lives in London and I’m in Manchester, so we’re having a day out ‘in the middle’. That being, Royal Leamington Spa – how posh – which just so happens to be where another old friend lives. Two (old) birds and all that!
I love travelling by train. It’s absolutely my favourite method of transport. I’m a bit of an old fashioned geek like that and would love nothing more than to take a trip on the Orient Express. It’s on my bucket list. Hint hint wink wink, babe – who am I kidding? He never reads this.
I love watching the gorgeous British countryside rolling by, earphones in, Tears For Fears soothing my soul, as I contemplate my little family and the journey we’re on. Adventures we are yet to take.
I imagine the places my Bunni & Bear will go without me, as young adults, with their friends or loved ones.
Will my Bunni take a similar trip to see her best girl in times of crisis? Will she know how important a good friend is?
Will my Bear travel cross country to meet up with a friend and tell them of his plans to marry? Will he know the importance of showing someone complete and total love?
Will they want me with them? Not always is the honest answer, and that is how it should be but it’s hard to imagine a time when I will be the one being left behind, excited for them but feeling that loss none the less.
There will be places and times which I simply cannot be part of and that’s an odd notion right now. But I hope that both my babes know that whatever they’re doing and wherever they are, I am always their home. Not the building I reside at, or the town it’s in, but me. I am home. I am their home and they can take a bit of me, their home, with them on whatever journey (near or far) they embark on.
For now though, I am the one on an adventure ‘to the middle’, and while it isn’t quite The Orient Express, it’s a pretty fine day and I cannot wait for a cheeky lunchtime cocktail.